Last year august 2011, my wonderful husband, then boyfriend at the time popped the magical question I had been waiting for all my life (even though I hadn’t known him all my life, but you know what I mean ladies….) ‘Would you marry me?’ ‘Yes, Yes, Yes’
So that was when our wedding planning officially began. We had spoken about getting married before, what the day would look like, the colour theme, etc, etc but I wasn’t budging till I had that rock on my finger and boi did he deliver…lol….
However, it didn’t stop there. He continued to take the lead with our wedding, to the point where people would comment on how involved he was with the wedding (usually the woman plans and the man………well……), so it was great to be working hand in hand on our first big event as an engaged couple.
The great thing about planning your wedding together, is that you start to see each others strengths and you also see how easy or challenging it is working together as one. One of the challenges could be your lovely parents ‘I want this, I want that’, however as two people soon to be one, you both have to discuss what it is YOU both want for your wedding and then move forward from there.
If you allow your families or even friends to get overly involved in your wedding planning, you will have a wedding that neither of you ever wanted and it can cause unnecessary stress on you both, which you don’t need!!!
What was great with us, was that we knew what we wanted and decided that we would take the lead on our wedding. We would take into account our parents wishes but ultimately it came down to what we wanted and we sure had the wedding of our dreams!!!!
PLAYING TO YOUR STRENGTHS
Soon after getting into the planning stages, it was clear to see that Ade was the creative one (don’t get me wrong, I am very creative, but he is definitely BETTER..), he knew what colours would look amazing together, what sort of lighting we needed for our photographs, and so on (being an international wedding photographer, he certainly had the eye) and I was more than happy to go along. You see, planning a wedding is not about control or I’m the female and I MUST have this, that and this….but actually its about creating a day that will blow you BOTH away and your guest.
The wonderful thing was that our strengths played well together, as I was great at understanding what Ade wanted and then sourcing vendors who could make it happen.
Ade brought the creativity – I brought the management.
Planning your wedding day is the first big event that you will plan together as a couple, so be sure to
A) Support each other by making a promise to listen, understand and be selfless in your planning
B) Play to each others strengths by identifying and delegating according to ‘who is good at what’, even if one of you is doing more than the other, that fine – ITS YOUR STRENGTH for the bigger picture
C) Outline what you both deem to be very important for your wedding and ensure those things get covered and implemented on the day. You can always have a great wedding but if the things that mattered most to you weren’t there, you will always feel like something was missing
D) Have designated times for planning and also time for yourselves; where you don’t talk about the wedding ‘NO,NO,NO’. Remember to have your fun time!!!!
Your wedding day is equally important to both of you, so be sure to give it your all…..because I promise you…..”there’s nothing more meaningful and significant than being able to sit back at your wedding reception and truly admire your great work as a couple“.
Your wedding planning is great preparation for your marriage, this is just one of the thousands of things you will have to plan together!!!